04-07-10

As many of you may or may not know, I was discharged on Friday for good behavior. I was able to go home for Easter and see the new and exciting changes at my house. Thanks to all that helped in the destruction and reconstruction of those beautiful hardwood floors. They look amazing. I was giddy about all of the changes.

I had lots to be giddy about this past weekend. Saturday morning I went to Waffle House with my husband and brother in law and could not stop smiling. I felt like it was too good to be true, civilization was everywhere. I was just so happy. Although, I will admit that I wanted to desperately hear those heartbeats that I have heard every morning and evening for the last month. It became a start to my day and so I was already searching the internet for monitors that you can rent or purchase. Nothing was stopping me from hearing those beats for my own peace of mind.

No matter what I did this weekend, I had a strong feeling that it would be short lived. I had made my first follow up appointment with Maternal Fetal Specialists for Tuesday morning. When I would decide what I wanted to do, I did it because I just knew I was going back soon. So with everything I did, I followed it with, "Won't be able to do this after Tuesday." Someone would mention that they were going to come see me soon, but glad I was out. My response to them was, "Wait til Tuesday, you will have another opportunity to visit me in the hospital." I was serious even if no one believed me.

Well, I really should have gotten that mani and pedi on Monday. Because Tuesday morning, my fate was sealed...yet again. The conversations with Richard were about how he missed the hospital coffee, I said he would have another chance soon to get some. And he has already had a few cups.

Maternal Fetal Specialists: Dooms Day Part 2:

As the Sonogram lady (one day I will ask for their title) did the ultrasound, she got to Myrtle's Doppler and I knew I was going back. I immediately saw reversal flow in her umbilical cord. Now, last time it showed reversal because of her having the hiccups and the jerking was causing the mis-read on the Doppler. Clearly, she was not having a bad case of the hiccups this time. I did not say anything to the nice lady or Richard. I just sat there wondering if I really knew what I was seeing. They had told me what to look for and how it would be on the ultrasound. Needless to say, it was exactly how they described it. Again, I knew I was not leaving...again. Sometimes I hate being right all the time!!

The sonogram lady told me to stay on the table because Dr. Eller may want to see the Dopplers for himself. So I stayed and then they sent us to a Comfy Room to wait. Yep, further confirmation...I wasn't leaving. We had to wait for him to see a patient at the hospital and then the ultrasound proceeded. The first words out of his mouth besides..."Hello" and "glad you got to go home" were...."I have to send you back." The exact words out of my mouth in response, "Dr Eller, I don't think I want to see you again." After a chuckle, the serious talks began. The reversal flow was evident again. At that point the reversal was not with every heartbeat. It was a few heartbeats with reversal flow and then a few without and it just repeated.

Going back wasn't as hard to do this time. I had already a routine and then I find out my Ab Lib, do whatever you want orders were not in my future stay. Bed rest was in my future. Not only bed rest but I would have to be on the heart monitors for 24 hours CONTINUOUSLY! Giving the situation had went from stable to worse in just a few days, I was happy about the monitoring. I knew I would be uncomfortable but my babies would have constant monitoring. And we would know immediately, if there heart rates changes.

Well, it gets worse. Dr. Eller personally called the on call doctor for today, Wednesday, 04-07 and prewarned him of a possible C-section for me today. My OBGYN was notified of the delivery also. I was told not to eat anything after midnight to be prepared for the surgery. At this point, I was still calm. However, I really wanted to beg for more time. Right now, I am 28 weeks and 3 days. Perhaps I am greedy when I say that I want 30 weeks. But she is already reversing and I know they will not watch it for too long.

So it is 435am and I have been wide awake since 300am and I am waiting for 800am to get here. I will have another ultrasound and Dr. Fang from Maternal Fetal will make his judgement call as to whether he feels the babies need to be taken. And surprisingly so...I am calm. Which is highly unusual considering I stress about everything. Maybe Myrtle and Flossie are telling me that they will be okay if it comes to them being delivered today. I am at ease with whatever happens, oddly enough. Richard and I have been prepped on the procedure for a C-section and watched a video. He has stayed the night so he will be here for "The Call."

In just a few hours, I find out if I will be a mother today. My brother will find out if he will be sharing his birthday. Please keep us and these precious and stubborn girls in your prayers. I have been so appreciative of all your support and kind words. Although I have never met many of you, I have been overwhelmed with your support. Thank you so much.

Waiting a few more hours...